A Halloween Brainstorm - Back in the Good Old Days

Hallowe'en will soon be here

I'm thinking of some things we did

A hundred years or less ago

When I was just a kid.

We went to some old farmer's place

And dismantled his hay rack

But the biggest thrill was to upset

That little house out back

The plumbing's now been moved inside

By almost everyone

That makes it handy for the folks

But it sure has messed up our fun.

The kids now come around each year

In costumes weird and neat

And when we open up the door

They all yell "trick or treat!"

They now have parties and entertain

The kids in lots of ways

Now most things aren't like they were

Back in the GOOD OLD DAYS.

D.B. Cox

They Grow 'Em Big in Oregon

 

I’m just a little baby snail

One end’s my head, one end’s my tail

I ate some juicy leaves last tonight

In Helen’s garden by moonlight

I really like to eat those greens

I love that lettuce and those beans

I’ll eat and eat, and grow and grow

Then I’ll become an “Escargot”

I must hide out before its dawn

If I get caught, I’ll get stepped on

And chances are just one to seven

I may wind up in that snail heaven.

D.B.C.

Happy Valentine's Day

Dan Cupid comes around this joint

This same time every year

He’s s’posed to shoot me in the heart

But sometimes hits my rear

If he just had a better aim

And hit me where he should

And fixed me up with some old widow

That surely would be good

But since he’s such a poor shot

Here’s how to make things fine

I’ll just forget about those widows

If I can be your Valentine

D.B.C.

This Was Another Revoltin' Development

I started out on this fine day

To go to the Super Mart

I think I would have stayed at home

If I had been half smart

I drove into this darn chuckhole

And now I can’t get out

So all that I can do right now

Is wave and cuss and shout

I can’t get out so I’ll sit here

And cry and trust to luck

That some old boy will soon show up

With a real darn good winch truck

And hook onto my little care

So we can soon begin

To try to get out of this

Chuckhole that I am in

When I get out of this big mess

I’ll finish up this ditty

Then from now on I shall just walk

Around in Chuckhole City

D.B.C.

A Bull Tail

The future for bulls looks real bad

That’s the reason old Toro feels sad

Artificial insemination

Is a horrible creation

It now becomes to me quite clear

I may as well be an old steer

D.B.C.

An Early New Year's Poem

Nineteen Hundred Eighty-two

Was fading fast away

We thought we’d have a midnight party

To bring in New Year’s Day

Someone said, “Thing sure are tough”

And I said, “They’re all right”

Someone else said “You’re all nuts”

That sure did start a fight

Then there I was down on the floor

With the rest on top of me

And soon I had these two black eyes

So I could hardly see

Next thing, my nose got flattened out

And I could hardly hear

Because some great big bozo

Had stepped on my right ear

Bells started ringing, horns were blowing

To bring in New Year’s Day

So I crawled over to the door

And quietly sneaked away

I sure am glad to be at home

But I know I’ll have to pay

To get some beef steak for my eyes

So I’ll be good as new some day

Now I’m recuperating

As happy as can be

I wasn’t sure that I’d survive

Till Nineteen Hundred Eighty-three

We plan another party

Sometime this coming spring

If someone asks, “How’s the country doing?”

I ain’t gonna say a dad-burn thing!

D.B.C.

T'was the Day After Christmas

T'was the day after Christmas

And you maybe can guess

That things at our house

Were really a mess

There was paper and boxes

And packing galore

And ribbons and scotch tape

All over the floor

We got lots of presents

I think it's because

We all still believe

There's a real Santa Claus

And though we are happy

And full of good cheer

We're glad Christmas comes

Only one day each year

Our expressions will change

To a frown from a grin

When those Christmas bills

start coming in

Happy New Year!

D.B.C.