Tuesday, March 17, 2015

This Was Another Exasperatin' Day

The day was March the Seventeenth
In Nineteen Hundred Eighty-Three
A bunch of us wild Irishmen
Decided to go on a spree

We drank a lot of Irish whiskey
And got as drunk as Murphy's pup
We then drank lots of Irish coffee
As we tried to sober up

On the next day, March the Eighteenth
Nineteen Hundred Eighty-Three
A bunch of us wild Irishmen
Were as sick as we could be

This wild Irishman is so sick
He can hardly see
He says he's never going to go
On another spree

D.B. Cox


Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Here We Go Again

We're going to turn our clocks ahead
Just like we did last year
They say we'll gain a lot of hours
To me it isn't clear

I've still lots of hours, unused
From Eighty-Seven and Eighty-Six
I don't really know what to do with them
I'm really in a fix

I've also got some hours I gained
in Eighty-Three and Eighty-Four
With all those hours I've got piled up
I don't need any more

If any of you folks down here
Need another hour or two
I'll gladly give you some of mine
That's the best thing I can do

I checked savings time in the country
and regular time in town
I find the hours are just the same
From sun up to sun down

D.B. Cox

Friday, February 13, 2015

Happy Valentine's Day!


On February the Fourteenth
Dan Cupid came down from above
He thought he'd shoot me in the heart
So maybe I would fall in love

He let an arrow flay at me
I think he's some kind of nut
He missed my heart almost two feet
And hit me right square in the butt

They say that we should not get made
But stay real calm and meek
And when someone does us wrong
We should turn the other cheek

But I am not real sure that I
Believe in all that stuff
So I did not do as they say
Because one sore cheek is enough

I don't know just long long t'will be
Till I can take a seat
Because the way things are right now
I have to stand up while I eat

D.B. Cox

Monday, February 2, 2015

Ground Hog Day

Here is a compilation of some of Grandad's Ground Hog Day poems:

Here I am out here today
And if it’s true what people say
I’ll crawl back in my hole and stay
Till it warms up some time in May

D.B. Cox 

I hoped I’d come out here and say
This is a really cloudy day
So I could fill your hearts with cheer
To think that spring would soon be here

But it’s not cloudy here today
So here’s all I can think to say
I really hate to let you down
I am the saddest hog in town

I saw my shadow big and clear
Just like I did this time last year
I’ll crawl back in my hold and stay
And come back out the last of May

D.B. Cox

This is the first time I've been here
I saw my shadow loud and clear
So I’ll go back home very soon
And come back out in May or June

I really like to eat that feed
I eat all that I can
As you can see I've ate too much
Or laid too close to my Old Man

D.B. Cox 

I came out there again today
On February Two
I really thought perhaps this year
I’d find something brand new

But it is still the same old story
I saw my shadow hanging ‘round
And I also found there wasn't
Any snow upon the ground

There’s six more weeks of winter
I suppose that make you sore
So I’ll crawl back in my hole and stay
Till Nineteen-Hundred-Eighty-Four

D.B. Cox

Well here I am out here again
I come here every year
But I won’t stay here very long
It sure is nice and clear

And here on this sun-shinny morn
My lovely shadow lays
That means it’s going to get real bad
For lots and lots more days

So I’ll crawl back down in the ground
I’ll not be back too soon
If it gets bad again in May
I won’t be back till June

D.B. Cox 

Ground Hog Day will soon be here
It comes about this time each year

The ground hog crawls out of the ground
He blinks his eyes and looks around

And if his shadow he does see
He makes a frown and says, “Oh gee,”

“Spring won’t be here for many a day”
Then crawls back in his hole to stay

Until he thinks, “This is the day”
Sometime in April or maybe May

But is his shadow he can’t see
He funds and smiles and yells, “Whoopee!”

For his is happy and filled with cheer
He says that Spring will soon be here

We hope he’s right and knows his stuff
Of that cold weather we've had enough

But we’re not sure that we agree
So we’ll just have to wait and see

D.B. Cox

The ground hog come upon the scene
About this time each year
He’s very anxious to find out
If it is cloudy or if it’s clear

He pokes his head out of the ground
To see what he can see
His cheeks are pudgy, his eyes are squinty
They say he looks a lot like me

If it is really cloudy
He nearly strips a cog
He thinks that Spring will soon be here
He is a happy hog

But it it’s really nice and clear
He promptly turns around
Spring won’t be here for several weeks
So he crawls back in to the ground

D.B. Cox

Thursday, January 29, 2015

Birthday Poems

Nearly every year, Grandad would write a poem and take a picture for his birthday. Here is a compilation of the remaining birthday poems:

I haven’t gone to Hell or Heaven
So I’ve reached the age of seventy-seven
My teeth are false, my hair is thin
But I’m in good shape for the shape I’m in

I am so pudgy my clothes don’t fit
I don’t work much, I mostly sit
I thought perhaps you’d like to see
So I took this photograph of me

I may be old and weak and slow
But I’m not ready yet to go
So I’ll just let the Devil wait
Then next year I’ll be seventy-eight.

D.B. Cox

On this very important date
I reached the age of seventy-eight

I wasn’t sure that I’d survive
But I think that I am still alive

My teeth are false, my hair’s still thin
I’m still OK for the shape I’m in

I have a lot of high-powered pills
To cure all kids of Old Age Ills

If I take my pills I’ll be just fine
Then next year I’ll be seventy-nine

D.B. Cox


I’ve reached the age of seventy-nine
I says to myself, “I’m feeling fine”
Self says, “Your aches and pains are few
But you’ve got lots of miles on you”

Then I says, “Yes but I’m all right
Cause I don’t smoke or drink or fight
And even though I may be queer
I’ll be eighty this time next year”

D.B. Cox

I’ve reached the age of eighty
And life has just begun
I’m in my second childhood
I should have lots of fun

If I have lots of aches and pains
It’s mostly in my head
Forget about the aches and pains
That’s what the doctor said

If I reach up for things real high
Look out, alas, alack!
Instead of getting what I want
I fall flat on my back

And then if I stoop over
To clean up this old place
I just keep going forward
And fall flat on my face

My toenails need trimming
To do that would be neat
But here’s the trouble with that chore
I cannot reach my feet

I’ll throw out my comb and brush
I’m running out of hair
My head resembles heaven
For there’s no parting there

It’s hard to read the paper
I have real poor eyesight
And all my teeth for just like stars
They come out every night

And when I go down town to eat
I find I’m prone to loiter
That’s the reason I’ve developed
This dad-burn table goiter

I guess that I’m real lucky
So I’ll stop feeling sore
And wonder what I’ll do if I
Hang on for eighty more

D.B. Cox


I’ve reach the age of eighty-two
For me that’s really something new
That equals two years plus four score
I’ve never been this old before

And though it’s sad I’ll try to grin
I’ll never be this young again
I try to cure most of my ills
By taking lots of high-priced pills

And even though I’m low on wealth
I’ll try to take care of my health
There’s lots of things I mustn’t do
So listed here are just a few

I will not ride in those fast cars
And I’ll stay out of all those bars
I won’t argue with any cop
And chasing girls will have to stop

I’ll do the things that are the best
And always get a lot of rest
I’ll be as good as I can be
Then next year I’ll be eighty-three

D.B. Cox 

I haven’t got to Hell or Heaven
And now it’s Nineteen-Eighty-Seven

I didn’t know if I’d survive
But I’m still here and half

I didn’t celebrate this year
I didn’t even have a beer

I hate to go out in the cold
I wonder if I’m getting old

I’ve reach the age of eighty-three
I’m still as happy as can be

If I catch cold and start to whine
I say to me, “You’re feeling fine”

I’m getting taller I declare
I’ve grown right straight up through my hair

If I can hand on for twelve months more
Then next year I’ll be eighty-four

D.B. Cox 


It’s Nineteen-Hundred-Eighty-Eight
And I’m too old to celebrate
I didn’t go to Hell or Heaven
In Nineteen-Hundred-Eighty-Seven

And I’m so glad that I’m still here
I’ll stay at least another year
I hope it’s better in Eighty-Eight
And the world’s not filled with so much hate

I’ve reached the age of eighty-four
That’s older than I’ve been before
It makes me sad to realize
I’ll never be this young again

So I’ll keep right on plugging away
And exercise most every day
And I’ll behave and stay alive
Then next year I’ll be eighty-five

D.B. Cox


I guess I’m still alive because
I haven’t gone to Hell or Heaven
I’ve hung around another year
And reached the age of eighty-seven

I’ve never been this old before
I’ll take it with a grin
Because I’m really sure that I
Will never be this young again

I guess the Stork delivered me
In Nineteen-Hundred-Four
It really was an awful shock
I’d never been born before

It was a cold and blustery day
So he wrapped in a nice warm cover
Then left at a home so I
Would be close to my mother

When I was just a little type
I was ornery as could be
If I had been my parents
I would have drowned me

When I was old enough for school
I wasn’t too good and not too bad
But when I finally graduated
It sure did make the teachers glad

So I kept right on growing older
And getting bigger too
I finally reached adulthood
Like most all knot-heads do

I went to work in the oil fields
I was lucky to be hired
I worked for lots and lots of years
And finally retired

I’ve been retired for a long time now
There’s been some tears but lots of laughter
And lately I’ve been thinking about
That thing called the here-after

Some say that after we pass over
We could come back again
We might be almost anything
Expect we won’t be men

If we come back again they say
We don’t know what we’ll be
I wouldn’t want to be a fly
For someone might swat me

There are lots of things I think about
I wouldn’t want to be
I’d hate to be an old plow horse
For work and I do not agree

I wouldn’t want to be a pig
For instance an old shoat
Another thing I’d hate to be
Is a dadburn billy goat

I could come back as a grizzly bear
I don’t know how one feels
They sleep from fall until spring
That’s too long between meals

If I came back as a giraffe
That’s worse than being a goat
It would be revoltin’
If I got a sore throat

I might come back as a grey wolf
But I have heard it said
If I ate some old rancher’s sheep
He’d shoot me in the head

I’d hate to be a dadburn snake
That’s worse than being a their
They say when one crawls through the grass
That tickles underneath

I’ve thought about this coming back
But after hearing what’s been said
I don’t think I’ll come back again
I think I’ll just stay dead

D.B. Cox

Friday, October 31, 2014

October 31st, 1984


On Halloween in Eighty-Four
There came a knock on my front door
I thought it was someone from town
But out there stood a Circus Clown

It said to me, “It’s tricks or treats!”
So I gave it a bunch of eats
I said, “If you will pose for me,
I’ll take a picture for folks to see”

I took a quick snapshot of it
It only stayed a little bit
It said, “It looks like it might snow,
And I have lots more places to go!”

Some other ghosts gave me a scare
Then I sat down in my easy chair
And thought, I’m glad they call came here
And they’ll be back again next year

D.B. Cox

Monday, October 27, 2014


October is a lovely month
When the leaves start looking like gold
It isn't overly hot this month
Nor it isn't overly cold

That's when we start to reminisce
About things old and new
Like Columbus, who discovered us
In Fourteen-Hundred-Ninety-Two

Halloween will soon be here
With goblins in masks and sheets
And when they come around that night
They tell us "trick or treats"

It reminds us of when we were young
We were always short on jack
Our biggest thrill was to upset
That little house out back

Those little houses have long been gone
We've now grown old, and so
We'll just relax in our easy chairs
And dream of things from long ago

D.B. Cox