A Terrible Hallowe'en Scare

(This one's for Meghan the Bear.)

I had a scare on Hallowe’en

That I will not forget

It made my hair stand up on end

And I am shaking yet

The doorbell rang, I answered it

At gosh, there was a bear!

It scared me so I ran back in

And hid behind a chair

I sat behind that good ol’ chair

And shook real bad with fright

So then I peeked out from behind

And said, “Please bear, don’t bite!”

So then the bear let out a laugh

It laughed and laughed with glee

It sure did tickle that brown bear

To think how it scared me

So I gave it some Cracker Jacks

And then I went and got

My camera out and focused it

And took this bear snap shot

D.B. Cox

Phoey on House Cleaning

(This one's for Meghan.)

Spring arrived some time ago

And I’m really sad

It’s spring house cleaning time again

And that sure makes me mad

Dusting is a nasty job

But doing it is a must

It’s got to be done good to make

Room for more “canyon” dust

And then I get the vacuum

And walk a mile or two

Back and forth and forth and back

I’m glad when I get through

Doing all those household chores

Is really hard on me

I wind up with two dish pan hands

And also house maid’s knee

By the time I’m through with it

My two poor feet don’t track

I relax in my chair and say

“Oh my aching back”

When I am dead and in my grave

No more house work will I crave

And on my tombstone painted yellow

That house work killed this poor old fellow

D.B. Cox

He never will be rich becuz He's still as dumb as he ever wuz.

I didn’t do too well in school

I must have been some kind of fool

I made it through by just a crack

Came in the front and out the back

In Math they asked, “What’s X times Y”

I didn’t know and wondered why

They’d ask a thing like that of me

I even flunked “What’s 2 times 3”

The Latin teacher said, “D.B.,

Can you translate ‘Puer’ for me?”

I said, “I think that must mean glass”

That sent me to the foot of the class

In History I didn’t do real good

The teach said, “D.B., you should

“Describe Columbus to me if you can”

I didn’t even know the man

So here I am, still wondering why

They wanted to know “What’s X times Y”

D.B. Cox

(Sorry it's been so bloody long since I posted a Grandad gem! I hope to post weekly now until I have them all posted.)